


Love potion

by Niibeth



Category: Dredd (2012), Saturday Night Live Sketches, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Dubious Consent, Fairy Tale Elements, Love Potion/Spell, M/M, Soldiers, Witches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-25 02:20:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14967035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niibeth/pseuds/Niibeth
Summary: Once upon a time there was a brave soldier. On his way home, he met a witch who feared many things.





	Love potion

**Author's Note:**

> English is my second language, so feel free to point at the grammar errors.
> 
> Let's be friends on Tumblr - I'm [Niibeth](http://niibeth.tumblr.com).

Once upon a time there lived a brave soldier named Matt. Years in army took him a long way from home, so his road home was also long. He walked through the woods, crossed the rivers. And after all the horrors he has seen at war he wasn’t scared of any monster or beast.

It was spring, and nature healed the wounds left by war, generously pouring rain on the seeds of its labor. Matt saw an old woman walking towards him and asked her if there is a village, a tavern or at least a dry barn nearby?

\- If you go back, you can return to Small Buttons and if you keep walking you will get to Big Buttons, but that will be late at night even with your long legs, or you can…  
\- What?  
\- Doesn’t matter.  
\- I don’t want to go back, granny, and I don’t want to walk under that rain through the night, so if there is a third option, please, tell me.  
\- Well… Halfway to the Big Buttons the road turns left, and there lives an ugly witch. Maybe you can stay there…  
\- Excellent! – said Matt – I love that witch already. Good day to you, grandmother.

Invisible sun rolled down to west as Matt saw the path leading to a small crooked cottage. He knocked on the door and a handsome young man opened it. The only blemish a person could see in him was an eye patch, so Matt thought: “Maybe he is a witch’s customer”.

\- May I see the ugly witch? – said the soldier.  
Young man blushed and said:  
\- I’m the witch.  
\- Aw, - said the soldier, - I’ve been misguided. Please, forgive my rude words. I’m looking for a place to stay overnight.  
\- Oh, - said the witch – Please, come in. No one should stay outside in the night.

The house was crammed and small, but cozy. And witch, whose name was Techie, was hospitable. He lent Matt dry clothes and shared his meal with him. Matt talked about things he saw in far lands, and Techie talked about local people and things he saw in the woods. And as the night drew nearer, Matt thought that he’d like to spend more than one night here and preferably not in his sleeping bag, but on the master bed, under the nicely made quilt, hugging a pretty witch.

When they finished the cake, the witch asked Matt, what drinks he likes.  
\- Well, I’d like a good whiskey, but any horse piss will go if it burns.

Techie took a small green bottle from one of the shelves and said:  
\- It’s an herbal infusion I make myself. Hope it’s better than horse piss.

The drink was not bad, it was bitter and surprisingly strong. Matt drank and then the witch blushed again and asked Matt to go to bed with him.

Matt woke up to a sunny day. The witch cuddled near, their legs and arms were still entwined and the whole house smelled of herbs, flowers and wooden dust. Witch opened his healthy eye and said in a very serious tone:

\- You don’t have to go home, Matt. You must stay here, with me.  
\- Fine, - said Matt – There was nothing for me there anyway.  
Matt liked his new life. During the day Techie planted or gathered herbs, prepared potions and consulted villagers, who came to his house. And Matt busied himself with a building a lean-to, because the house was small, and he was big, and he didn’t want to break any of Techie’s fragile belongings. Sometimes they visited Small or Big Buttons where the witch tended to people who couldn’t come personally, and Matt kept vigilant in case any poor soul dares to call his love ugly. And the nights they spend under the quilt or – rarely – on the quilt, because for some unfathomable reason the witch was very shy and preferred to hide under layers of cloth day and night.

Their life wasn’t devoid of trouble. Techie feared many things and had nightmares, that made him shout and shiver in Matt arms. And Matt proved the nickname Gunpowder Matt he deserved among his comrades in arms. Whenever anything failed or stacked, he raged and shouted and broke things. And he immediately felt guilty, especially since Techie apologized every time Matt showed his temper, as if this was his fault.

Once, when the autumn rain started, Matt struggled with the leaky roof and got so angry that he slipped and fell on the flowerbed, crushing lot of flowers and gathering several bruises. He cursed the heaven and hell, and Techie apologized and broke into tears. After the witch calmed a little and made sure that Matt hasn’t broken any bones, he said that he must talk to his brother and asked Matt to wait in the lean-to.

Techie’s brother was a royal wizard. Brothers communicated via magical crystal and it took a lot of effort and concentration from Techie’s part.

“One day he will kick me away, - thought Matt, - and he will be right. And maybe it is today. Techie is too kind, but Armitage will surely have no qualms. He will give a proper advice. Maybe I should pack and leave myself”.

But Matt’s backpack and his faithful musket were in the main room, so all he could do was to wait. 

Brother’s counsel took longer than usual. Matt tried to restore the order on the flowerbed he destroyed, repaired a loose board in the fence, polished his boots, waited a little more, and then, finally Techie called him inside. The witch took a small red bottle from one of the shelves and offered Matt another of his drinks. He looked sadder than usual, and his eye was puffy and red.

\- Well, how do you feel?  
\- Fine! I mean, brooses hurt a little, but fine, thank you, all your drinks are quality ones.  
\- No, I mean, how do you feel towards me?  
\- I love you, Techie – said Matt.

Witch shook his head.  
\- No, no, that can’t be…  
\- What do you mean?  
\- I gave you an antidote. Armitage said there are two steps. Well, step two… - Witch faltered.  
\- If it was a wisdom potion, it didn’t work, because I still don’t understand anything.  
\- Remember the day we have met? I gave you a drink? I have enchanted you, Matt, that was a love potion. You should feel it now. I mean. Stop feeling it, because this is an antidote.  
\- Bullshit, I loved you before I drank, and I still love you, - argued Matt, - You are mistaken.  
\- But you did everything I asked from you!  
\- Because I love you…  
\- But you were always so angry.  
\- Techie, I’m angry because I’m a shitty person, and how can it be connected to your potion anyway?  
\- Armitage said, you are angry because you mind has two conflicting pa-pa-paradigms and it frustrates you, - The witch started crying again – And that is all my fault.

The soldier stood up.  
\- No. I love you. And my anger is my fault. But now I will leave.

So, he grabbed his musket and his backpack and stormed out of the house.

He walked under the nasty autumn rain through the woods and over a river – a small one – and talked to himself.

\- Stop, - he said. And he stopped.

\- Why do you leave? He loves you. You love him. What is wrong? But he enchanted you. No, he didn’t. But he thought so. But he felt guilty. Only because you were angry! If you were always calm, he wouldn’t say a word… 

Matt walked a little more and stopped again.

\- That’s not fair. Maybe he would have told. You have not asked him. Return and ask him. I’m sure he is crying now. And what if not, what if he prepares a new potion and waits for you to return into the trap?

Matt looked around but haven’t seen any one-eyed magpie or toad – he knew the ways Techie used to spy on people.

\- How can I return to my love, if I don’t trust him anymore? – he asked himself.  
\- Well, because I’m not afraid, - he answered and walked back.

It was already dark when he knocked on the door of the little cottage. Techie opened. He looked downcast and was dressed in more layers than ever.

\- Hi! – said the brave soldier – May I see the ugly witch?  
\- It’s me – answered the witch.


End file.
